Small Steps, Big Shifts: Week One of Transforming My Life

Today marks the end of Week One of a year-long experiment to transform my life and reach my wildest goals. The main questions driving this experiment are:

How do we get “unstuck” and out of our own way?
How can seemingly impossible goals be broken down into attainable steps that lead to real transformation?

For years, I’ve been healing from trauma and depression. I finally feel like myself again and ready to take action, but I’ve spent months overthinking and getting in my own way. I became so sick of it, that I decided to turn my life into an experiment to see how far I could get when I stopped holding myself back.

By committing 100% to this journey, documenting every step to hold myself accountable, and pushing myself to pursue my biggest dreams, I’ve already experienced some powerful mindset shifts and growth. By sharing every gritty detail of this journey, I hope to show how even the smallest steps add up to big shifts and achievements.

Here are my main takeaways from Week 1—I hope they provide motivation and ideas for your own goals. Or maybe inspire you to start an experiment of your own! (Find out more about the experiment and how to set up your own here).

I. Main Lessons You Can Apply to Your Own Experiment or Goals

1. 100% Commitment Is Easier than 98% Commitment

One of the most freeing shifts I’ve experienced this week is the power of total commitment. As Harvard professor Clayton Christensen wisely says, “100% commitment is easier than 98%.”

Before, when I was at 98%, my mind gladly filled in all the reasons I couldn’t do something or all the reasons not to. Now that I’m fully committed, my brain and I are on the same team. It’s removed so much of the self-doubt. Every thought and action is aligned with making this work, and suddenly, new ideas and inspiration just keep flowing.

Once I reached that 100% commitment mark, creative solutions and plans for my website and Instagram posts came to me effortlessly. It’s the difference between going from “I can’t” ➡️ “How can I?”.

2. Aim for the “Impossible” Goal, Not the “Realistic” One

What is realistic anyway? Who knows what could happen if you went all in? And how soul-crushing and completely-not-inspiring is “realistic”??

I was scared to share my “impossible” goals for this experiment, but every time I mention them, they become more normalized, less unrealistic/scary, and more real. And as Dr. Benjamin Hardy says in his book Be Your Future Self Now (an amazing book that I could not recommend more), it’s better to fail as your future self than succeed as your current self.

3. Let the Goal Determine the Process

This is another recommendation I learned from Dr. Benjamin Hardy, and I couldn’t agree more.

In the past, I struggled to break down my goals and figure out where to start. But looking back now, I realize I was afraid to go for what I really wanted and instead set goals that felt more attainable. I see now that with these lesser goals, I was trying to figure out the “how” to get from where I am to the big vision I’m now going for.

I’ve now let go of the “how,” i.e. which specific business or idea to go with. Instead, I let the goals guide my process. So for example, once I decided to go for my biggest 3 goals (find my dream apartment in DC, start a podcast with 100,000 downloads, and earn $20,000 per month) and reach them within one year, then it was simply a matter of reverse engineering to get there.

Setting goals was a huge block for me in the past, but once I decided what I wanted, I simply plugged them into ChatGPT and asked for a monthly breakdown of how to get there. Sure, there’s still a lot I don’t know about the specifics, but I know where to begin and I know to let the goal guide the process. Going forward, I will cut out whatever isn’t getting me closer to my goal, and be open to whichever pathways do.

4. Act On Your Big Idea and Invest in Your Future Self Right Away

One of the biggest breakthroughs for me was realizing that acting immediately on an exciting idea brings momentum. Investing in my future self—whether through financial commitments or time investments—sends a powerful signal that I’m fully on board.

For example, I invested in a coach and signed up for a masterclass, and soon after, I saw unexpected “signs” of support, like the biggest translation job I’d gotten in months and two unexpected sales. Acting on inspiration rather than overthinking simply doesn’t allow time for doubt to join the conversation.

It’s liberating to be more like Michael Jordan on this, who famously said, “Once I made a decision, I never thought about it again.”

5. Committing for the Long Haul Eases Fear and Doubt

For years, I’ve struggled with self-doubt and confusing myself out of taking action. Once I committed 100%, started taking imperfect action, and created a real pathway toward the “impossible,” that disappeared (even though my new goals are objectively bigger and crazier than the ones I couldn’t believe before).

Now that I know I’m playing the long game, I am more so motivated by being consistent, putting out more and more, and improving the quality of my posts over time rather than motivated by metrics or outward “results.”

I don’t care anymore about the first posts not being perfect, because anyone who sees them will see what matters, which is that I STARTED.

6. Schedule Play and Breaks for Better Productivity

I used to feel so much guilt around taking breaks, and would often chain myself to my desk all day when completing a big project. There was even guilt this week when watching too much TV.

But what also became clear this week was that my best ideas often came from taking breaks, dancing, singing, or even watching TV. Embracing Dr. Fiore’s “Unschedule” concept from The Now Habit has helped me prioritize play, making work more enjoyable and focused. Scheduling guilt-free play has not only been fun but has also improved my productivity when I am working.

7. Watch Out for “Productive Procrastination”

One surprising takeaway from Week One was realizing how easily “productive procrastination” can creep in. Before posting my first video, I re-recorded dozens of takes, convincing myself each was “better” than the last. But in the end, I realized that re-filming was coming from my fear of judgment and taking action.

At the end of the day, once I did post the video, I was proud just to have taken imperfect action and gotten started. So what I posted almost didn’t matter.

Overall, I’m amazed how much this experiment has already changed so much for me just in Week One. It has helped me get unstuck in so many ways already and take action I’d avoided for years. I also have way m ore energy not that I’m working on something.

If you’re thinking about creating an experiment of your own, I’d highly recommend it! It helps to remove you emotionally from your ideas/results and to create structure and accountability around your goals. And, it may even make you see that your “crazy, impossible” goals aren’t as far-fetched as they seem.

Nonetheless, there have been some struggles in Week 1…here’s what I’m doing about them:

As amazed as I am with how things have changed, I’ve realized my deeply-ingrained habits won’t just change overnight. Here’s what I’ve struggled with in Week One:

Avoidance & Too Much TV: TV has been a way of avoiding “needle-moving” tasks, and it feels like an addiction at times. I even logged out of Netflix to create some distance but ended up logging back in. I know I’m more committed to my goals than this, so finding a better balance with TV is something I need to work on.
Late Nights: Staying up late to read or watch TV has been an ongoing challenge, affecting my energy and productivity the next day. Although I’m aware of the impact on my days, the habit is tough to break. This inconsistent sleep routine often means starting the day later and losing valuable time.
Lack of Daily Structure: Without daily goals, I’m experiencing scattered workdays and decision fatigue, which slows down my progress. Years of ADHD and an identity built around “needing pressure to get things done” have made trusting myself with daily deadlines a challenge. Building that self-trust and setting clear daily goals is my next step.
Distractions on Social Media: Once I open Instagram or my blog, I lose hours just doing “stuff” without clear intentions. This lack of focus means I end up wasting time and feeling like I haven’t made meaningful progress. Setting specific goals for each session is something I’m realizing would help me make better use of my time.

I’ll update you in Week 2 about what I did to overcome these struggles and how they’re going! After all, it can be the small changes that compound to make the biggest difference over time. (So remember this next time you’re struggling. Sometimes, it doesn’t take much to start moving things in the right direction!)

Thanks for reading! Feel free to reach out with questions or comments and keep up with the experiment by checking out the following:

The Experiment Blog
Subscribe below to stay updated on the experiment and get monthly journal prompts for your goals based on what I’ve learned!
The Podcast: Get Over Yourself (Coming soon!)
Tune in to my podcast once it’s launched in November 2024. I’ll be interviewing successful people from all walks of life who’ve overcome all circumstances – from mental health challenges, financial struggles, trauma and more to create lives they love. Together, we’ll break down their journeys into tangible, actionable steps.
Behind the Scenes on Instagram
I’m not waiting until I’ve “made it” to share my story—I’m doing it now, in real-time. You’ll get to see everything as it unfolds: the small wins, the setbacks, and the lessons that come from both. On Instagram you’ll see what it actually looks like to change my life.

Ready to start your own experiment?

Sign up for my weekly newsletter to stay updated on new podcast episodes, blog posts, and exclusive insights you won’t find anywhere else! And, check back in later this week for a step-by-step, in-depth blog post about how to start your own experiment and change your life for good.

Stay tuned,
Milly

Small Steps, Big Shifts: Week One of Transforming My Life